Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The Ring Cycle – Frasier Transcript 10.1

Niles Crane and Daphne Moon finally gets marriedDaphne: I, Daphne Moon, do take thee, Niles Crane, as my husband. I promise you my fidelity and my support, my laughter and my tears, my constant friendship and my unending love as long as we both shall live.
Niles: I, Niles Crane, do take thee, Daphne Moon, as my wife. I vow you my fidelity and my support, my honor and respect, my honesty and my protection. You are my comfort, my joy, and my one true love. I will cherish you all the days of my life, and treasure the journey that has brought us to this most wonderful, perfect place.
Wedding Officiant: For most folks, that’s one too many free cocktails.  Continue reading...

The wedding officiant of the Lucky Seven Chapel laughs.

Wedding Officiant: Am I right? Seriously, do you have the rings?
Niles: Oh…no. In our rush to get here, I completely forgot about them.
Daphne: Does this mean we can’t get married?
Wedding Officiant: It would if we didn’t offer seven different wedding band packages for you to choose from.

The wedding officiant of the Lucky Seven Chapel brings out a tray of tacky wedding rings.

Wedding Officiant: Now, depending on your budget we can offer you anything from the “Be ‘Steel’ My Heart”—that’s genuine stainless right there—to the “Never-ending Love”, which can be returned for up to 90 days—no questions asked.
Daphne: They do seem the nicest.

Daphne’s cellular phone rings.

Daphne: Oh, damn! Who could be calling at this hour?

Daphne Moon answers her cell phone, while Niles Crane scrutinizes the ring.

Niles: Wow, you certainly don’t see 6 ½ karat gold every day.
Daphne: Hello?
Roz: Daphne, it’s Roz.

Roz Doyle is in her bedroom watching television.

Roz: Quick, turn on your TV. My building’s on the news.
Daphne: What?
Roz: Some murder-suicide thing. I’m going to wave to you from my balcony.
Daphne: Darn, I’m not home.
Roz: Where are you?
Daphne: You’re not going to believe this, but Niles and I flew to Reno and we’re getting married right now.

The wedding officiant swipes Niles’ credit card.

Roz: You are not!
Daphne: I am so!

The women scream in excitement.

Niles: Apparently, it’s some sort of dolphin emergency.
Daphne: I should go. I’ll tell you everything when we get back. Okay, bye.

The women hang up the phone. Roz Doyle sighs and claps her hands then looks at the TV.

Roz: Ooh.

Daphne Moon returns in front of the podium where Niles Crane waits.

Daphne: Sorry.
Wedding Officiant: You may exchange rings as a symbol of the promises you’ve made here today.

Niles Crane slips the ring into Daphne’s finger. Daphne chuckles. Niles Crane clears his throat. Daphne Moon slips on the ring into Niles’ finger.

Wedding Officiant: By the power vested in me by the State of Nevada, County of Washoe, and the all-new Lucky Seven and Casino! I now pronounce you husband and wife. Good luck.

Canned music of pipes and bells starts to play. The wedding officiant makes his way to the door, and looks back to tell them something.

Wedding Officiant: Hey, don’t forget to check out our topless buffet.

The wedding officiant leaves the chapel. Niles Crane who still is holding Daphne Moon’s hands turns to her.

Niles: He never said, “You may kiss the bride.”
Daphne: You may kiss the bride.

Niles Crane and Daphne Moon kiss passionately as husband and wife.

BLAME IT ON RENO

Frasier Crane anxiously jingles his keys.

Frasier: Chop, chop, Dad. Let’s get a move on. Last time I was late for the Farmer’s Market, I got the worst of the squash blossoms.

Marty Crane dressed as a security guard steps out of the kitchen with his packed lunch.

Marty: Oh, whatever shall we serve the duchess?
Frasier: What?
Marty: I said, “I’m coming.” And it’s not my fault I’m late, it’s Daphne’s. I don’t know where she is. I had to make my own lunch.
Frasier: Oh, dear Lord. Give it here.

Frasier Crane grabs his father’s brown bag, and looks inside it.

Frasier: Two bags of chips, three puddin’ cups, and a root beer.
Marty: What’s wrong with it?
Frasier: A. This is not a lunch, and B. I fail to see how it took you so long, since you did not make anything, but simply transferred smaller containers into a larger one. Let’s go!

Frasier Crane opens the door, and finds smiling Daphne Moon, and surprised Niles Crane on the other side of it.

Niles: Oh, uh…
Frasier: Oh!
Daphne and Niles: Hello, all.

Daphne Moon and Niles Crane enter the house.

Frasier: Hi.
Marty: Where have you been? I had to make my own lunch.
Frasier: Oh.

Frasier Crane closes the door.

Daphne: We’ve got some big news.
Niles: Um, maybe they should sit down.
Daphne: Oh, yeah.
Frasier: What’s going on?
Daphne: Well, last night I told Niles that I wanted to marry him right then and there.
Niles: And once I realized she was serious, we rushed out into the night fully intending to.
Daphne: But then we found out that in Washington it takes three days to get a marriage license.
Frasier: Thank goodness!
Niles: Why?
Frasier: Why?

Frasier Crane turns to his father.

Frasier: If we had missed your wedding, well, it would have just killed me.
Niles: It would have?
Frasier: Oh, of course it would. Niles, we’ve been there through the last ten tortured years of your courtship. How could we not be hurt if we missed the wedding?
Niles: But surely you could understand if someone were carried away by their emotions…
Marty: I’m just glad it turned out the way it did, because it would have just broken my heart.

Daphne Moon and Niles Crane both have a queasy, and guilty look on their faces. With their hands behind their backs, they remove the rings from their finger.

Niles: Well, we didn’t come here to break anyone’s heart.

With their hands still behind their backs, Niles Crane takes the Daphne’s ring to hide it with his.

Niles: We came here to tell you that there’s a wedding in three days!

Frasier Crane, and Marty Crane laugh in delight.

Frasier: Oh, well!
Daphne: Isn’t that big news?!
Niles: We’re gonna have a, uh, a simple ceremony at the courthouse.
Frasier: That is just wonderful! And you know what? By way of a celebration, please allow me to treat us all to dinner at Coeur du Singe. How does that sound, huh?
Daphne: That sounds wonderful.

The doorbell rings.
Marty Crane opens the door to find Roz Doyle with her Dalmatian.

Marty: Hey, how are you doing?
Roz: Want to go to the dog park? Oh, my God! You guys are here!

Roz Doyle screams in excitement, and runs to Daphne and Niles to give them a hug.

Frasier: Well, I’m here, too.
Niles: Um, we were just talking about our wedding.
Roz: Oh, good, I want to hear all about it.
Daphne: We’re going to have a small civil ceremony on Friday!

Roz Doyle yells.

Roz: Huh?
Frasier: Yes, if you’ll excuse me, I’m in a rush to get to the Farmer’s Market.

Frasier Crane makes his way to the door followed by his father.

Niles: At this hour?

Niles Crane looks at his watch.

Niles: I hope you like listless radicchio.

Frasier and Marty leave and close the door behind them.

Roz: Okay, what the hell? I thought you guys got married in Reno.
Daphne: We did, but as we were trying to tell Mr. Crane and Dr. Crane, they told us how hurt they’d be if we got married without them.
Roz: Oh.
Niles: Yes, yes, which in the moment, failed to occur to us. So, to spare their feelings, we’re having a fake wedding on Friday.
Roz: Well, that works for me, because Alice is still counting on being a flower girl.
Niles: Of course.
Daphne: Great.
Roz: So, if you guys have two weddings when’s your anniversary going to be?
Daphne: Well, I suppose to keep up appearances, it’ll have to be the second one, won’t it?

Niles Crane turns to Daphne Moon.

Niles: Well, we could celebrate two anniversaries. A public one, and then a second, secret one just for us.

Daphne Moon turns to Niles Crane.

Daphne: Ooh, I like that. Sort of sexy having an anniversary only the tow of us know about.

Roz Doyle who is sitting on Marty’s chair looks at the two newly weds sitting on the couch gaze at each other’s eyes.

Roz: Three of us.

Niles Crane’s eyes stay fixed on Daphne Moon’s.

Niles: I still can’t believe we’re married.

Daphne Moon’s eyes stay fixed on Niles Crane’s.

Daphne: It’s our one-day anniversary.

Roz Doyle turns to the two lovebirds who haven’t looked away from each other.


Roz: And we’re the only ones who know.

Daphne Moon continues to gaze at her husband’s eyes.

Daphne: You know, we should celebrate.

Niles Crane gazes at his wife.

Niles: How about going to the dog park?
Daphne: That doesn’t sound very romantic.
Niles: I’m not talking to you.

Roz Doyle gets up her chair, and gladly makes her way out the door with her dog. Daphne Moon and Niles Crane make out on the couch.

Daphne and Niles are at the courthouse waiting as Frasier and Marty talk to the judge.

Niles: Nervous?
Daphne: Less than last time. I guess it helps to have had a rehearsal.
Niles: That wasn’t a rehearsal. It was the real thing. This is just a touring company performance.
Daphne: Right.

Niles and Daphne kiss.
Daphne Moon’s mother arrives with Roz Doyle, and her daughter Alice.

Gertrude: It’s a bloody miracle we’re here in one piece what with the way you drive.
Roz: I’m better at it when someone’s not screaming in my ear.
Gertrude: Well, in my day, people didn’t drive so recklessly. Do you know why?
Alice: Is it because you rode dinosaurs?
Gertrude: You should talk to your daughter.

Gertrude walks away. Roz Doyle has a chat with her daughter.

Roz: When we get home, you’re getting ice cream.

Roz Doyle with Alice enters the judge’s chambers.

Frasier: We’re all here, Your Honor.
Gertrude: Why did we all have to be here just to pick up a bloody license? Couldn’t we have met at the church?
Daphne: Mum, we aren’t going to the church. We’re getting married here.
Gertrude: You’re what?
Niles: We’re having a civil ceremony.
Gertrude: Without a minister? Out of the question!
Daphne: Mum…
Gertrude: That’s enough, Daphne. I am your mother and I will not bear witness to a godless union.
Marty: Gertrude, I favor a church wedding, too. But this is their day, not ours. Maybe we should just let them decide how it’s gonna be.
Gertrude: If people got to decide things for themselves, no one would go to church.

The judge gets up his chair.

Judge: If I may…
Frasier: Oh, I’ll handle this, Your Honor. Mrs. Moon, you have my personal guarantee that this will not be a godless union. For if you truly believe in the omniscience and omnipresence of the Lord, then surely are we not always in His presence?
Gertrude: No, He lives at the church. All I’m asking is that you honor the wishes of an old woman whose every child has been married by a minister—or at least a prison chaplain.
Niles: Perhaps given the depth of feeling here, it would be best to wait.
Frasier: Well, I suppose we could find a church in reasonably short order.
Daphne: I don’t believe this.
Judge: If you’re not going to get married now, perhaps you could all take this into the hall. I have a schedule to keep.
Gertrude: Roz, take me home.
Roz: Ugh.
Niles: We’ll call you when we’ve cleared this up.
Roz: Okay. Let’s go Alice.

Roz Doyle opens the door. Alice turns to Niles and Daphne.

Alice: Congratulations!

Alice throws flower petals on the floor.

Roz and Alice walk out the door.

Gertrude: When you’re ready to have a proper wedding, you know where to find me.

Gertrude Moon leaves.

Frasier: That we do! On your fiery throne presiding over the damned! All right, let’s go. Marty: Where are we going to find a clergyman who will perform on such short notice?

Niles, Daphne, Frasier and Marty leave the judge’s chambers.

Frasier: Hey, maybe the judge knows somebody. Hang on a second, you guys.

Frasier and Marty Crane return to the judge’s chambers.

Frasier: Your Honor…

Niles Crane turns to Daphne Moon.

Niles: I’m sorry, Daphne, but it’ll just be few days and then we can be married.
Daphne: We already are. This is supposed to be the happiest time of my life. I want to wear my wedding ring. I’m Mrs. Niles Crane, and I don’t want to keep it a secret.
Niles: You just want to tell them the truth?
Daphne: Too complicated. Let’s just get married again.

Daphne Moon pulls Niles Crane to the judge’s chambers.

Niles: The wedding’s on.
Frasier: What? What about Mrs. Moon?
Daphne: I’m sorry she’ll miss it, but that’s her choice. Your Honor, we’ve changed our minds. We want to be married.
Judge: Oh, all right, but we have to be quick about this. Are we ready to begin?
Daphne and Niles: Yes!
Judge: Okay, let’s do it. Daphne, please repeat after me.
Daphne: Actually, we’ve written our own vows.
Judge: Of course you have.
Daphne: I, Daphne Moon, do take thee, Niles Crane, as my husband. I promise you my fidelity and my support, may laughter and my tears.

Frasier Crane begins to cry. Marty looks at him with embarrassment.

Marty: You said you wouldn’t do this.

Daphne continues with her vows.

Daphne: My constant friendship…

Teary Frasier Crane turns to his father.

Frasier: I say a lot of things.

Frasier Crane opens the door of his house to the newly weds.

Niles: Oh, Frasier, thank you so much for dinner.
Daphne: Yes, it was wonderful.
Frasier: It was my pleasure. Dad, don’t you have something to add?
Marty: Well, I already said thank you for dinner. What am I supposed to do, get down on my knees, and kowtow to your fancy-ass American Express card?
Frasier: No, I was referring to the gift we have for them.
Marty: Oh, right! I forgot about that.

Marty Crane quickly gets up of his chair to get the gift.

Marty: Yeah, and thanks for dinner, Fras. It really was excellent. And I didn’t think I’d like beef cheeks…
Frasier: Yes! Yes, Dad, give them the gift!
Daphne: This is so exciting—our first wedding present.

Marty Crane gives Daphne Moon and Niles Crane their gift.

Daphne: Oh, it’s a silver picture frame.
Niles: Beautiful.
Frasier: And, nota bene, it’s been engraved with today’s date. In order to commemorate your wedding day until your real gift arrives.
Daphne: Oh, it’s very sweet. Thank you Mr. Crane, and Dr. Crane.
Marty: Well, you can’t call us that anymore. We’re family now.
Daphne: So we are. Well, thank you…Frasier.

Frasier Crane and Daphne Moon laugh. Frasier gives Daphne a kiss on the cheek.

Daphne: Oh, that feels strange, and thank you Martin.
Marty: Dad?
Daphne: Dad.
Marty: Or Martin. Whatever makes you comfortable.
Daphne: Oh, thank you, Mr. Crane.

Daphne hugs Marty Crane and gives him a kiss on the cheek.

Daphne: Well, I’d better go and figure out what to pack for the honeymoon.

Niles Crane gives his wife a quick kiss on the lips. Daphne Moon goes to her bedroom.

Niles: I’m just bringing sunscreen.
Frasier: Pardon me. I have to go poke out my mind’s eye.

Frasier Crane goes to the kitchen.

Marty: Ah, you’re lucky. I always wanted to go to Bora Bora.
Niles: Oh, it’s going to be fantastic, Dad. We’re staying in a thatched hut built out over the water. In the middle of the floor, there’s a window where you can look straight down to the bottom of the ocean.
Marty: Oh, I hope it’s not too deep when we went to the top of the Space Needle, and you looked down, you got sick.
Niles: Dad…

Marty Crane gets up his chair, and makes his way to his bedroom.

Marty: All over that poor Japanese tour group.
Niles: Dad.
Marty: And when I yelled down to warn them, they just looked up.

The doorbell rings. Niles Crane gets up to see who it is.

Niles: That was three years ago.

Niles Crane opens the door, and anxious Gertrude Moon enters.

Gertrude: Did you find a minister yet?
Niles: I’m sorry, no. Actually…
Gerturde: Good, then I’m not too late.

Daphne Moon enters the living room.

Daphne: Too late for what?
Gerturde: Oh, Daphne…

Gertrude Moon walks over to her daughter.

Gertrude: When I got home this afternoon, well, I was opening a bottle of scotch to have me tea, and I began thinking…I was married by a minister in a church, and what’s it got me? Alone and unloved is what. And likely because I’ve been such a rotten mother to you all these years.
Daphne: You haven’t been rotten.
Gertrude: Oh, yes, I have. On what should’ve been the happiest day of your life, I thought of only myself. I’m ashamed, I’m, I mean, I’m embarrassed. And I apologize.

Gertrude Moon is on the verge of tears. Daphne Moon tries to contain her tears.

Daphne: Oh, Mum.

Daphne Moon gives her mother a hug. Mother and daughter hug.

Gertrude: Oh.

Daphne Moon cries.

Gertrude: Oh, my only solace is you aren’t married yet, because if I missed my baby’s wedding, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. Daphne…

Gertrude Moon turns to Niles Crane, and extends her hand to him.

Gertrude: Niles…

Niles Crane holds Gertrude Moon’s hand.

Gertrude: You get married any way you want to. All that matters is that I’m there to share it with you.
Daphne: Of course you’ll be there.

Daphne and Gertrude hug, and cry once again. Daphne removes her ring, and with her mother’s back turned hands it to Niles.

Daphne: We’ll go right back to that courthouse tomorrow, and resume where we left off.
Gertrude: Oh, nothing could make me happier.

Frasier Crane enters the living room with a bottle of wine.

Frasier: Ah! Mrs. Moon, I see you’ve made peace with the wedding.
Niles: Yes, Mrs. Moon has rescinded her ultimatum so we’re having the wedding tomorrow.
Frasier: Ah! Niles, may I have a word with you?
Niles: Mm-hmm. Excuse me.

Niles follows Frasier to the kitchen.

Frasier: What the hell is going on? You guys already got married.
Niles: Yes, but she doesn’t know that, so tomorrow we’re going to have another ceremony for her benefit.
Frasier: That’s crazy.
Niles: It may be, but I’m afraid the truth would crush her.
Frasier: Oh, please. All the winepresses in Brodeaux wouldn’t crush that woman. Niles, what you and Daphne shared today was utterly unique.
Niles: You think so?
Frasier: Yes, it was a singular moment. Anyone fooled by a repeat performance would have to be a complete imbecile.
Niles: True. But if it’s what Daphne wants, I’ll support her. We’ll get Roz back, we’ll find a different judge, and we’ll just do it all over again. And..it’ll be just as perfect as today’s was.
Frasier: Fine. But I’m not singing “Wonderful World” again.

Niles Crane gasps.

Niles: Maybe more perfect.

The next day, Daphne and Niles sit at a bench in the courthouse.

Niles: Remember how excited we were at our first wedding?
Daphne: Yeah, we were both shaking.
Niles: Yeah.
Daphne: Hey, I noticed the first time, you promised me your honesty and protection, but not the second time.
Niles: No, because I vowed to, uh, always be true and to be your constant champion. It’s the same thing.
Daphne: I supposed.
Niles: You liked it better the first way?

Daphne Moon nods.

Niles: Okay, we can go back to that.
Daphne: Thanks.
Niles: You making any changes?
Daphne: Nope. Same old, same old.

Roz Doyle arrives, and chants.

Roz: Dah, dah, dah, dah…

Gertrude Moon, Frasier and Marty Crane are right behind her.

Daphne: Where’s Alice?
Roz: Oh, upset stomach. On the way home yesterday, she snacked on the leftover petals in her basket. So, I’m sorry, but I won’t be able to join you for dinner.
Niles: We understand.
Gertrude: Explain it to me then. What sort of child eats roses? ‘tisn’t normal.
Roz: You could’ve stopped her, you know.
Gertrude: Not the way she was gnasing them up, I couldn’t. Like a wood chipper, she was.

Roz Doyle whisper to Gertrude Moon.

Roz: All right.
Gertrude: The incredible beaver baby.
Roz: We get it.
Frasier: Oh, dear Lord. Isn’t that Donny?! Everybody, look at your shoes.

Everybody looks at their shoes.

Donny: Daph…is that Daphne?

Donny with a woman beside her walks toward Daphne Moon.

Daphne: Donny.
Donny: Hi.
Daphne: What a surprise.
Donny: Hi, everybody. Boy, I hope this isn’t uncomfortable.
Frasier: Oh, no, no, not at all. Uh, say, is that a drinking fountain over there?
Gerturde and Roz: Oh yeah.
Marty: Looks like one.

Frasier Crane walks away followed by Roz, Gertrude and Marty.

Donny: Well, Niles, Daphne, I’d like you to meet Bridget, my fiancée.
Bridget: Hi.

Niles Crane shakes Bridget’s hand.

Niles: Hello.
Bridget: We just filed our marriage license.

Daphne shakes Bridget’s hand.

Daphne: Oh!
Niles: Congratulations.
Daphne: That’s great.
Donny: I know that I was getting married last time you ran into me, but this time I found the real thing.

Donny kisses Bridget.

Daphne: Good, I’m glad.
Donny: Yeah. You know, if you hadn’t left me, then I never would’ve met my ex-wife who introduced me to Bridget. So, in a weird way, you played a big part in my eventual happiness.
Niles: That’s uh, a very healthy perspective.
Donny: I think so, too. So, what are you guys doing here?
Daphne: Niles and I are getting married.
Donny: Well, congratulations. That is great.

Niles chuckles. Donny shakes Niles hand.

Donny: Daphne.

Donny hugs Daphne.

Daphne: Thank you.
Donny: Yes, well. It’s great, and it’s nice seeing you. And I hope you come to our wedding.
Daphne: Oh, same here.
Donny: Really, you’d be okay with that?
Daphne: Well sure. Why not?
Niles: Of course, it’s anybody’s guess how long we could be waiting here.

The judge walks out of the chambers.

Judge: You can come in now.
Niles: Who had one second?

Niles and Donny laugh. Niles turns to the rest of the entourage who are on the other end of the hallway.

Niles: Uh, everyone, it’s time.
Frasier: Oh, well, here we go then.

Daphne Moon with Niles Crane right behind her enters the judge’s chambers. The rest of the entourage including Donny and his fiancée follow them inside.
Donny introduces his fiancée to Frasier Crane.

Donny: Uh, this is Bridget, my fiancée.
Frasier: Oh, lovely to meet you.
Bridget: Hi, nice to meet you.

Everybody says hi.

Marty: Hi, how are you doing.

Everybody takes their places.

Judge: Is this everybody?
Niles: Yes.
Judge: Let’s get started. We come here today to unite this man and this woman in marriage. I understand Daphne and Niles have composed vows that are especially significant to them. Niles.
Niles: Yeah.

Niles Crane clears his throat, and holds the Daphne’s hands.

Niles: Uh, I, Niles Crane, take you, Daphne Mon, to be my wife. I—I vow to you my—my fidelity and support, honor, respect, uh, honesty…protection…

Daphne Moon looks disappointed at Niles who struggles to remember his vows.

Niles: …and support. Uh…you are my comfort and joy and, oh…shoot, there’s one more, uh…
Daphne: One true love.
Niles: One true love. That’s right, that’s right. Okay, you go.
Daphne: “Okay, you go”? I, Daphne Moon, do…I’m sorry, this is wrong!

Daphne Moon lets go of Niles’ hands.

Daphne: I can’t stand here and rattle off a bunch of words that don’t mean anything anymore. I can’t go through with this.
Donny: Yes! I knew it!

Donny points a finger at Niles Crane.

Donny: Now you know what it’s like to have the love of your life dump you at the altar. And good luck trying to find somebody as good, because she just ain’t out there.

Donny remembers that his fiancée is in the room. He quickly turns around to look at her. Bridget’s jaw drops.

Donny: What?

Bridget leaves.

Bridget: No, no. No, Bridget!

Donny runs after his fiancée.

Donny: Bridget!

Daphne addresses her entourage.

Daphne: I’m sorry, everyone, but Niles and I, we’re already married.
Gertrude: What?
Frasier: Mrs. Moon, I’m afraid it’s true. Uh, Niles and Daphne are already married, and they were simply trying to spare your feelings.
Roz: You knew about Reno?
Frasier: I was talking about yesterday. What happened in Reno?
Roz: They got married yesterday?
Gertrude: This is all a lie?
Daphne: No, yesterday was a lie. We eloped last week.
Marty: Thought you had to wait for the license?
Niles: That’s why we went to Reno.
Frasier: Why didn’t you tell us?
Niles: We thought you’d be insulted.
Frasier: I’m insulted now! How could you tell Roz and not your own family?!
Gertrude: How could you have two weddings without telling your mother about one?
Roz: How could you cheat Alice out of being a flower girl?
Daphne: We just wanted to be married.
Marty: Hold on, I got a question here. You’ve been married a week. How come you’re not on your honeymoon?

Marty Crane opens the door for Daphne and Niles.

Daphne: Thank you…Martin.

Daphne Moon and Niles Crane make their way to the door.

Niles: I hope you can all forgive us.
Roz: Of course.
Frasier: Well, of course we can. Of course. Your happiness, that’s what’s important.
Daphne: This is such a relief. It just felt wrong to start off a marriage with a lie.
Gertrude: Um, was the first one at least in front of a minister?
Daphne: Of course.
Niles: Yes, let’s go.

Alice walks from the hallway to the living room of Frasier’s house throwing flower petals on the floor. Daphne Moon who is carrying a bouquet walks right behind her. Roz’ Dalmatian with the pillow bearing the ring tied around its neck, and Edie with a bowtie watch them. Alice walks to her mother as Roz walks towards Marty, Niles, and Frasier. Marty pretends to be the minister, and opens a large book. Meanwhile, Alice pops petals inside her mouth as she watches the fake ceremony.

This is not the actual script. This is my own transcription of the episode. The “The Ring Cycle” episode was written by Jon Sherman. Frasier is owned by CBS Studios Inc., Paramount Pictures and Grub Street Productions.


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